Selfish is such as nasty word, isn't it? If someone calls you a "selfish cow" - it hurts. After all, society tells us that we have to think of others first. We need to give before we can receive. We have to consider our family and friends when making a decision that will affect our lives.

But how long do we keep on like this before we feel a lack of fulfilment or even a little resentment towards our loved ones. We may cry silently in to our late night cocoa because of a dream that has passed us by. Our daily tasks and errands that we do for others deplete our energy levels to a level that may affect our health. At what point is it good to be selfish? Why can't we seem to think of some decisions and actions to be self- loving rather than self-centred?

When we live out our lives by other's rules or get caught up on the treadmill of life, it is easy to forget about our dreams and ambitions. We become programmed to think in terms of doing what is best for our family, our career and our mortgage. But what is best for YOU? If you feel genuinely unhappy with your life or you feel something is missing - it might be time to start being a little selfish. Want some top tips on putting yourself first for a change? Well read on.

Top Tips on putting yourself first

Understand yourself better. Ask yourself "what is it about what I do that is important to me?" Explore and discover your values. If you are not living your life to these values, this could be one of the reasons why you may be feeling that something is missing in your life or even feel trapped in to a routine that you not happy with.

What drains you of your energy? If a daily task or a certain person saps you of what precious energy you have - you have a choice to do something about it. What might you do with that energy if you found a way of plugging up that drain?

Ban the word "guilty". If it is guilt that is stopping you from doing something, you need to address it. Guilt can cause resentfulness. Your loved ones will not appreciate you taking it out on them for something they may not have even wanted you to do in the first place. For any woman who understands chocolate craving mood swings - it is easy to see that it is a happy woman that makes a happy home!

Diarise me-time. If you like organising your life and have everything from kids' club pick-ups to dry cleaning errands listed in your diary - make sure you write in your Cleopatra nights. Even if you only manage hour a week, you are more likely to follow it through if it is scheduled in.

Go after an "always wanted to". Having a goal in your personal life will ensure you have time out from your daily grind. So whether it is running a half- marathon, writing a book or organising a weekend with the girls, get some fun in to your life. You never know, this little bit of adventure could lead you to a welcomed new life direction.

Ask "Is this right for me?" When you make decisions that affect others, it is important to think of them. It is all part of process. But make sure you include YOU as well. Career changes, returning to work after children or taking extended leave to take a trip round the world may never happen it you don't face up to what you truly want. How do you want to feel when you are sitting in that rocking chair on the veranda of your retirement home? Feeling of regret or a feeling of fulfilment?

Check out the benefits of life coaching. Talking through your dreams and decisions with someone who is non-judgemental, impartial and believes in your ability to make the right choice for you, can help you become the person you want to be and do the things you want to do. Call or email for a free consultation now. Life is an adventure - start living it now!